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What is the difference between Meditation and a Hypnosis Trance State?

What is the difference between Meditation and a Hypnosis Trance State?

What are the differences between self hypnosis and meditation?

 

Both hypnosis and meditation are amazing tools to strengthen the brain, immune system, and your overall mood.

 

There is a thin line between the purpose of both due to the fact that they both take you into a relaxed state of mind, where you can access the higher, more enlightened self.

 

Today, I will explain to you the differences between the two, and why they are both extremely important for your overall health, especially if you experience symptoms like anxiousness, fatigue, indecisiveness, guilt, self blame etc.

 

In true Attitude On Ten fashion, we will allow the learning of these two modalities to BE EASY, so here it is in easy to digest language. 

Feel free to comment and start a conversation with me if you don’t fully understand the difference even after reading this information. I’d be more than happy, and willing to explain it further.

 

What is the main purpose of Meditation?

Meditation focuses on breath work, conscious mind control, and mindfulness.

Bringing you into your body and creating a heightened sense of awareness is the main goal of meditation.

Meditation is PRESENT based, strengthening your conscious self.

The practice of meditation is extremely powerful for calming anxiety and rampant negative thoughts and emotions, as it brings you back to the here and now.

 

 

What is the main purpose of Hypnosis?

Hypnosis focuses on trance induction in order to grasp habitual habits, behavior, and hard to get to thoughts and emotions that are underneath the surface of your waking reality.

Hypnosis is PAST and FUTURE based, strengthening your unconscious and subconscious self.

The practice of hypnosis is extremely powerful for changing harmful and self destructive behavior, distortions of the mind’s perception, and unveiling unconscious processes in your waking life.

Those are the main differences between both modalities in a nutshell.

 

You should practice both, and the changes you will see in your life will be absolutely amazing.

 I hope this post helped you clarify the difference of the two, thanks for stopping by.

 

Until we meet again…

I truly do appreciate you.

How to make time to meditate and best practice for beginners

How to make time to meditate and best practice for beginners

Meditation for Beginners

You don’t need to attend a yoga class, or take a meditation course, or have all the time in the world to begin practicing meditation.

I say these things because those are the main reasons why you may have not started meditating regularly, and I know this because I used these excuses myself in the past. 

 

Furthermore, you don’t have to be a pro at silencing your thoughts to reap the benefits of meditation either.

It took me a while to learn how to meditate on my own and it took me longer to know what to do with the train of thoughts that would interfere with what was supposed to be a moment of “emptiness.” This is by far the number one reason you may begin and then stop, “I can’t silence my thoughts.” The thing is, you don’t have to.

I personally began with guided meditations, and then I transitioned into meditating on my own. The next step was self hypnosis after I entered a hypnotic trance by mistake once (that’s another days post). Now I’m able to meditate and enter a hypnotic trance on cue.

 

My goal is to get you to see how you can add meditation to your day and LET IT BE EASY, so that you can start reaping all of the benefits.

 

FIRST RULE: LET IT BE EASY. 

Your subconscious mind will not allow your practice of meditation to flourish if you complicate it. 

 

The Easiest way to start your meditation practice in the comfort of your home

 

Pick a time of day where you can wine down effortlessly and perform a guided Body Scanning Mindfulness Meditation Session.

 

The reason why this is the best way to begin a meditation practice for complete beginners:

TIME, it is our one true tool when it comes to starting a meditation practice.

It is also what we think we don’t have, time, that will keep you from starting.

Here are the 3 best times out of your day to practice your meditation as a beginner.

  1. In the shower or bath
  2. Right before bed
  3. Right after waking up in the morning

We all must shower at some point, and this is the most privacy you will have all day. The bathroom is our only one true moment of privacy. Think about this for a second, it’s true.

 

I began my forgiveness rituals in the shower and allowed bitterness/ negativity to go down the drain as I showered. I also practiced my mindfulness meditation in a hot bath, as I laid in epsom salt and took 20 minutes to tune out, visualizing my future self down to a T. 

 

You can begin to meditate with this available time that you have in the shower or bath.

 

 

Before and after sleep is a golden opportunity to meditate as well.

We all must sleep at some time (and if you suffer from insomnia, this may help you sleep soundly). Dedicate the last or the first 15 minutes of your day to listen to a guided body scan meditation. 

Not only is it effortless because you are already getting comfortable and ready to rest, but your body is entering an alpha state of relaxation right before drifting off to sleep.

As far as meditating in the morning is concerned, before you step a foot out of bed, you are transitioning from a theta brain wave state during sleep. You can follow a guided body scan meditation then, as well. Just make sure you set an alarm for 15 minutes later, in case you drift back off to sleep.

 

My personal Meditation Journey and how I know this stuff works

I began when I was working the night shifts in 2015. The building I was in was vacant through the night and there would be no interuptions, so I took advantage and during my meal break I would practice meditation. 

My work ethics wouldn’t allow me to practice while I was technically on the clock, and this had everything to do with what I call “The Laws of Entitlement,” which I live by. 

I could not silence my thoughts to actually have a successful session, so I went on to youtube and searched for guided meditations. It worked like magic. 

Long and behold, I landed on what is called body scanning meditation, which is why I advise that you begin with this kind of guided meditation too. You will be guided to go into your body in the present moment. 

The guide will continue to walk you through and if you bring your focus to the directions given by the guide and do what they ask, then you will hardly drift off to miscellaneous thoughts. 

 

When I tried to transition from meditating on my lunch break to actually doing it at home, it was difficult. I was distracted and I had to ask myself what was the difference between meditation at work during break and at home?

Turns out, it is truly essential to make the time for meditation, but to feel like you are going out of your way to create the time will discourage you from starting your practice.

I did it at work effortlessly because I had to take a break anyway, I was entitled to my hour break.

 

So, I translated that into my home life. What do I do at home ANYWAY that would allow me to meditate at the same time.

What was I going to do anyway, that I could take advantage of to meditate as well?

  1. Showers and baths
  2. Right before bed
  3. Right before getting out of bed in the AM

These are 3 universal things that we will all do everyday! BINGO! 

I haven’t stopped since. I find time to meditate all throughout my day now, and I have perfected how to do it without a guide.

My practice has become quite prestigious now, as I have incorporated Crystal Healing, oils, candles, colors, and many other therapeutic tools to my practice. I LOVE IT! 

Meditation is a part of my lifestyle now, and you can make it part of yours too. Just begin with this simple way to begin and you will grow from there, guaranteed.

 

If you found this information helpful, I would love it if you shared it with others who may be on their own healing journey but are finding it a bit overwhelming or unnecessarily to find time to meditate.

 

Thanks for stopping by and until next time…

I truly do appreciate you.

What is the Difference Between the Subconscious and Unconscious Mind?

What is the Difference Between the Subconscious and Unconscious Mind?

There’s a thin line between the unconscious and subconscious mind that may cause some confusion.

However, they are two completely different things, and they both play a major role in accessing deep rooted beliefs and thought patterns that you experience in your life today.

 

When you better understand what the differences are and how you can access them, you can begin to alter your reality and find answers to why you live the way that you do.

In true Attitude On Ten fashion, we will keep this information super easy to digest and straight to the point. 

Let’s dive in.

 

What is the subconscious mind?

 

The subconscious mind is like a production factory, and as you collect information whether consciously or unconsciously through your senses, environment, influence, and experiences, they are all stored in the factory of your subconscious mind. 

 

Your subconscious factory then creates tools with this information as it runs through the machinery inside the factory, which is your brain itself. Every single bit of information is stored here, then the tools produce a default product (connections in your brain/ neural pathways.) 

 

The product consists of all the information you have taken in, whether intentionally or not. 

 

For example, a fear of clowns is fabricated in the subconscious factory. As an adult, you may know for sure that a clown at a 5 year olds birthday party is there for entertainment, but you are petrified of the clown. 

Chances are that somewhere in your subconscious factory, there is a memory, a moment in time, a spec of information, an entire production lying dormant that validates the fact (to you anyway), that clowns are terrifying.

Your subconscious mind has the answer, and it may just be a terror brought up early on from watching scary movies as a child, who knows. But since your subconscious is a production mechanism, it just produces the feeling that will guide your behavior based on the enormous amount of information it receives. PERIOD. 

It does not discriminate against any bit of information, and it is working around the clock, even in your sleep.

 

 

What is the unconscious mind?

The unconscious mind consists of knowing, without you having to give it any thought. 

The unconscious mind is your autopilot center. It is very hard to take the auto off and drive it manually, because it is great at what it does.

For example, what’s 1+1?

I’m sure you thought two, without any conscious effort. You carry the ability to add 1+1 in your unconscious mind. You don’t necessarily remember your very first math problem in school do you? Neither do you walk around ready to do some addition. You weren’t even thinking about math until I asked, but you can add on cue. 

You can dress yourself, walk, and breathe without giving it a second thought. It just happens, and these are all actions that are stored in the unconscious.

The unconscious part of your mind keeps things going in a way where you can continue to process information and store what you need to store on autopilot, unconsciously, like driving. Then, it just pops up when deemed necessary. It can also obscure things, like hurtful experiences etc. to protect you and keep you from doing certain things in life.

When you feel a moment of intuition, or what we call dejavu, it very well comes from your unconscious mind. It is communicating something to you. 

You can learn to tap into both your subconscious and unconscious mind. Start by becoming aware of them like you are now.

 

I hope this post helped you understand the difference between the subconscious and unconscious mind.

Isn’t it fascinating?

Until next time…

I truly do appreciate you.

 

How can I Tap Into my Subconscious Mind to Create Changes in my Reality?

How can I Tap Into my Subconscious Mind to Create Changes in my Reality?

How can I tap into my subconscious mind to create changes?

 

I tap into my subconscious mind all of the time, and I place new information into it on purpose in order to get what I want out of myself in life. I do this through self hypnosis and in this post I’m going to tell you how accessing your subconscious mind works.

 

First we’ll get into what your subconscious mind is and then I’ll explain what it means to tap into it and why you would want to do that.

 

What is my subconscious mind and what is it doing all day?

 

Your subconscious mind is your #1 executive assistant.

 

Your subconscious mind is taking notes of everything so that you don’t have to, and later when you need the info, it is readily available.

There is a con associated with your subconscious mind though, because your subconscious mind is also picking up on information that may not be all good for you. 

 

It does not discriminate on information intake, simply because it does not know the difference of right from wrong, good from bad, and light from dark. The subconscious mind just is. It is a sensory part of the mind that processes information and distributes it accordingly. It is collecting information nonstop, all the time.

This is why it is super important to surround yourself with positivity, feel good, and express goodness as much as possible. Doing this makes certain that throughout your day, your subconscious mind is collecting good information and all the goodness begins to show up in your reality, naturally.

 

How can I be sure that the good things are being programmed into my subconscious mind?

It’s easier said than done, being positive all the time; doing only good things, surrounded by good people, eating good wholefull food, hearing good things, feeling good things, thinking good things etc.

 

It may sound a bit excessive, but here’s the thing, your subconscious mind will scan your feelings, emotions, and all of your surroundings, all day, FOREVER!

 

How you feel, what you smell, what you want, what you don’t want, what you watched, what you listened to, what you visualized, what you said, what they said, etc. Your subconscious mind is the ultimate multitasker and is picking up on everything.

 

Furthermore, it does not rationalize for you, what you feed it is what you get in return, manifested in your reality. 

 

Because you have been unaware of this, it may take some time to start tweaking your subconscious mind to become a powerhouse of goodness with intention. 

 

But, today is your lucky day, because I am going to share with you how you can fast track the changes in your subconscious mind and start seeing results sooner than later.

 

The fastest way to change the subconscious mind

The fastest way to tap into your subconscious mind and begin revealing the things in your life that you truly want, is by feeding it experiences.

Yes! EXPERIENCES.

 

For example…

If you’re watching sad and romantic movies all week just know that your subconscious mind is recording and reciprocating. The movie is being experienced by your subconscious mind. It does not know the difference between reality and make believe. You are feeding your subconscious through your feelings and emotions, through depictions. 

 

This is why you cry during tragic scenes in a movie even though you are conscious that it isn’t real. Then you wonder why your emotions are running so high and you’re overly sensitive most of the time. Your subconscious says “this is what we are experiencing, and this is who we are.”

 

Try this and be conscious of it, watch nothing but comedy or inspirational movies, you know the ones with coaches who always triumph at the end and stuff like that, and watch your energy changes the next coming week. Even if it is a subtle change, you will notice it.

 

The subconscious mind is in the business of validation, so when it experiences something with great emotion, it continues to feed it to you in real time. So, if your experiences are out of balance with what you consciously want to create in your life, you will feel out of balance, kind of like if you are out of control.

You will find that you don’t feel in control of your feelings, your words, or not clear on your intentions. This many times may lead to living a reactive life. You are going through the motions unconsciously.

Balancing your Chakras when you are feeling this way will allow you to access the subconscious mind even faster. Clearing possible emotional blockages may be the answer to creating the changes you really want to create in your life.

 

What will happen when I begin to change my subconscious mind?

Here’s the twist, your subconscious mind makes habits of these things (experiences) because it is convinced that this is what you want, and that this is who you are. So after feeding it the same crap for a very long time, it will freak out when you switch it up, that is where the discomfort comes in.

The experiences have created connections in your brain (neural pathways), and when it is engraved in that way, habits become nearly impossible to change (or at least it will feel that way.)

 

For example, for a long time I would get home from work and prop my butt on the couch, say I was tired, and binge watch TV shows for an hour and a half. When I realized that I was wasting a precious hour and a half that I could have gotten a workout in, I decided to change my routine. 

 

I wasn’t very happy with my physical appearance and I knew that in order to change it I would have to start exercising and eating healthier. I knew that the habit of propping up on the couch was engraved in my routine, but my conscious self wanted to make some changes.

 

After several self hypnosis sessions, I began to naturally workout right after work.

I was in the middle of my workout and felt such a strong urge to sit down and watch my shows. It would always go away about 5 minutes after I deliberately removed the thought over and over.

It was the darndest thing, but thankfully I knew what was going on so I was able to push through. 

What was going on when my mind was clearly pushing against something that I really wanted?

I call it the INEVITABLE RESISTANCE, which is what the mind goes through on a scientific level when trying to make custom of something that is unfamiliar or out of the norm. 

It will show up in more than one way when you are creating transformational shifts in your life. Especially when you are creating a shift from something you have been doing for a very long time. 

 

Your subconscious mind will push against this new information you are feeding it and say “Wait a minute, this is not what we do, this is not who we are. We don’t work out right after work”… but why not? 

 

The key is to make sure that you are pinpointing the cues of your behavior and keeping as much as you can of the already existing routine. Add the new behavior in there somewhere. This makes it super easy for the subconscious to process. This process is called taking the path of least resistance.

Consistency is key and a solid push back during the building of your T.R.U.E. Identity will ensure that you are successful.

 

(I dedicate an entire week on the science behind The Inevitable Resistance, in my 8 week Transformational Coaching Program. It is an in-depth educational journey into what the mind is doing in processing the changes you make and D.R.I.L.L.ing your T.R.U.E. Identity in place. FASCINATING to say the least.)

 

When you begin to experience new things, even as small as watching new kinds of movies, having different conversations, watching your surroundings with intent, speaking in a new and positive way, your subconscious is picking up on it all.

 

What happens is you begin to create new connections in your brain, LITERALLY. You create new neural pathways and then the new experiences begin to resonate with you in a deeply impactful way. Soon, your external world begins to change too.

 

I’ve been staying super positive and the changes are small yet hard to make, why is that?

You may be doing all the things and still wondering why the changes that are showing up are so small, or they only last for a little while and you go right back to the same ole thing.

The reason that this happens is that you have been living a certain way for a very long time, you have had repeated thoughts, repeated behavior, repeated beliefs, repeated language, and thus a repeated personality type and identity that was built SOLIDLY as your foundation.

 

This just means that this Identity was drilled through a lot of experiences and the storage in your subconscious is hefty. 

 

You must find a way to tap into your subconscious in a more direct way than just making small tweaks in your everyday life, like the movies you watch for example, or positive self talk. You must go deeper love.

Because listen, your subconscious will take your FEELINGS into account, not your words. It knows the truth regardless of what you try to tell it with words.

 

This is what turns me off about a lot of Manifestation and Law of Attraction Coaches and Gurus, but I am here to tell you the truth, so here it is:

NO MATTER how many affirmations you say, or how many visualizations you try to create, if you don’t FEEL it, you won’t ACHIEVE it.

 

Let’s use the “l am Rich” affirmation for example, so that I can break this down for you.

Say “I am Rich” for the next 30 days, and feel it as you say it, follow your intuition toward the money, and you will be led to it, or attract it. 

I absolutely believe this! YES! I’ve done it and attracted the coins! (my crystals are also a huge part of the abundance manifestations I have created in my life).

 

There’s just one thing missing here. Your subconscious mind is not on board with you simply saying you are rich. The key word in this particular directive is to FEEL IT. That is when the subconscious will accept it as a fact.

 

The only way to feel it without actually having it is to visualize it, but even that is a hassle, and if it were that easy, then we would all be great at it. The subconscious mind knows that you are trying to feel rich (TRYING), not actually doing it. 

 

What EXPERIENCES can you purposely create that will make you feel rich?

 

Can you go test drive that car you’ve always wanted?

Can you visit a million dollar open house that is on the market?

Can you manage to give yourself a self care day where you can pamper yourself at the spa?

Can you upgrade your appearance so that you are feeling good because you look like money?

Can you surround yourself with some high earners who think differently, talk differently, and act differently when it comes to money?

 

If you incorporate experiences into your life that signal money growth then your subconscious mind will more easily pick up on the ability to accept the concept as truth.

But, I did mention earlier that your subconscious mind doesn’t process the difference between what is real and what is not, so visualization is in fact one of the ways to manifest and shift your subconscious for abundance. Once you learn to FEEL your visualizations, like you be feeling those movies you watch, then you are on your way!

If you can learn to effectively meditate and visualize then you can influence your subconscious mind even faster.

 

It is hard to meditate and visualize. How can I silence my thoughts?

You are not alone on this one, and it is probably why so many people may begin to practice meditation and give up because they cannot silence their thoughts.

 

This used to happen to me, until I discovered guided meditations and visualizations.

You do not need to be in total silence when you are first starting out. Find a good guided meditation to get you started practicing how to meditate. 

When you are listening to a guide, you hardly drift to your own thoughts.

If you practice guided meditation for a while you will begin to pick up on the art of meditation. Allow the guide to paint a picture in your mind’s eye, allowing yourself to flow and relax. As you visualize the guide’s prompts, your subconscious is picking up on it. 

 

Soon your subconscious mind will agree that you meditate. It will become a part of your identity.

 

After you have created a bit of a habit with the guided meditations, you can venture off of the guided meditations and create your own practice. You can play some soothing music, or stare into a candle flame, there are so many styles of meditation that you can adopt.

I teach how to do this with Crystal Healing, removing blockages and rewriting your life’s narrative in order to change deep rooted habits. But, the truth is that my journey began with the tools that I am sharing with you today.

Begin your visualization meditation exercises on your own by painting a picture of your specific wants and needs. This is when your subconscious mind will really pick up on the shifts you are making consciously.

 

Use these prompts to make sure that your visualization exercises really sink in:

 

Where am I?

What am I wearing?

What am I smelling?

What am I hearing?

What am I saying?

How am I speaking?

Who’s here with me?

What am I feeling?

 

Be as specific as you can possibly be, and the experience will become easier to create each time.

 

You will have thoughts that come and go, but that is a good thing. You will begin to be in flow and understand that those thoughts that come up every now and then are in need of release, so give them the permission to come and go. 

 

Begin to tap into your subconscious mind by using these easy to implement techniques in this post. 

 

Whether you know it or not, you’ve already begun a shift in your perception by taking this information in. Your brain has created a new thought, a new experience, and you are now embarking into a new journey of self discovery. I’m super excited for you.

 

If you found this information helpful, I would love it if you shared it with others who may be on their own healing journey but are finding it a bit overwhelming or unnecessarily complicated.

 

Thanks for stopping by and until we meet again…

I truly do appreciate you!

How to Buy Your Crystals

How to Buy Your Crystals

Check out this very beautiful set that I purchased on Amazon, and while I do prefer to buy in person, and advise my clients to do the same, this set makes the exception. Check it out here. It is an amazing set for beginners.

The Attitude On Ten Shop will be up and running soon (filled with sacred tools and products). I am in the process of testing and making sure all of the products are amazing for you.

 

Until then, enjoy this post and don’t forget to share.

How to buy your crystals in person and online.

The Right Way to Purchase Your Healing Crystals…whether online or in person, is to purchase them through your soul intuition.

 

You must buy the crystals that call to you. This also applies to buying crystals that you can use during your Chakra Balancing and Crystal Healing sessions. Simple right!?

One crystal may not call to you, but another one may. It is good to have options, and it all depends on your vibrational match. I’ll also say this, if a crystal repels you, you should consider working with it too… read on to find out why I say this.

 

How do crystals call to you? 

It is scientifically proven that all crystals have a frequency/vibration, and are used for their energy power, even in the literal sense. 

“Scientists understand that applying pressure to certain crystals, such as quartz, generates a specific form of electricity.  The computer and electronics industry depends upon crystal technology and could not exist in its present form without it.” 

So when it is time to shop, allow crystal energy to guide you. You can test this and see that you only research the crystal you purchased, after the fact.

Chances are you will be blown away by the properties of the crystal after you do your research, and it will more than likely fit you like a glove. This means it is called to you and you are meant to have it, and work with it.

Take a stroll inside a crystal shop, botanica, etc. or scroll through a crystal website until you feel a natural pull to one, or two, or three. 

 

The Crystals With No Pull

You may notice a crystal, and have no energetic intuitive pull toward it per se’, but for some reason it stood out to you, or you keep going back to it for no apparent reason. You may even find it to be a pretty unattractive crystal.

These “no pull” crystals are also very useful. These crystals are being pulled by the subconscious and unconscious part of your mind, and for that reason you may want to lean into them, even if you aren’t consciously attracted to them. They can reveal so much to you later on as you work with them.

 

Shopping for the purpose of Chakra Balancing and Crystal Healing 

This changes things a bit and now I want to speak on buying specifically for practicing Chakra Balancing and Crystal Healing.

While the intuition should be applied to all Crystal Buying experiences, I want to make sure that you are also buying in accordance with your energy body so that you can begin true inner healing and manifesting your desires. 

This is going to be short and simple, because as you know, here at Attitude On Ten we LET IT BE EASY and want to create an effortless flow for you on your energy manifesting journey, so…

With that said, sticking to the color that corresponds to each chakra is the beginner friendly and easiest way to go.

  1. Root- Red
  2. Sacral- Orange
  3. Solar Plexus- Yellow
  4. Heart- Green
  5. Throat- Blue
  6. Third Eye- Indigo
  7. Crown- Violet 

Buy the crystals that you are intuitively drawn to with these colors associated, so that you can begin your sessions, plus the variety of colors really add a nice pop to your Sacred Place.

 

Of course there are many other crystals that can be applied to each Chakra that do not follow the colors listed above. For example, rose quartz is pink and can be applied to the heart chakra during a session, selenite is white and can be applied to the crown chakra during a session, sodalite is blue and can be applied to the Third Eye Chakra during a session, etc. but for the purpose of this post and keeping it beginner friendly, stick to the color chart for now.

Begin by incorporating the color, use your intuition, and as you further your practice you can begin being intentional with the historical energy properties of each crystal you own. They are such powerful tools.

I hope you found this information helpful and begin to buy your beautiful crystals today.

 

Thanks for stopping by and until we meet again…

I truly do appreciate you.

 

2 Techniques to Rebuild Inner Strength and Tame Depression

2 Techniques to Rebuild Inner Strength and Tame Depression

So, you want to know how to stop feeling depressed and emotionally drained all of the time?

I wish I could say that I have some form of overnight revelation or epiphany to share with you today. 

You know, the type where I say that I snapped out of the detrimental mental state I was in with the quickness, but I’d be lying to you, so I’d rather be honest; it was hard!

But, if you want some real life techniques to begin the healing, and some effective Energy Work methods that you can start using today, then continue reading.

(Trigger warning, and quick disclaimer: the information in this post may trigger feelings and emotions that you may want to avoid, and I am in no way offering medical advice. This post is solely to share with you what I did when I was feeling depressed and how I did it.)

 

Sometimes, you must RECONSTRUCT most of your programmed belief system in order to really get to that place in life where you can truly be happy and accepting of yourself.

I’m not talking about tweaking small setbacks today, I’m talking about working through the deep down hurtful stuff (Deep Impact Mind Work), the memories and beliefs that tear you apart from the inside-out…

In today’s post, I’m sharing how I became a new person after suffering through some severely traumatic experiences in my life, and how you can do the same.

 

It is necessary to REBOOT and hit that RESTART button when you hit certain downfalls.

 

You will hear so many coaches and gurus refer to what I’m about to discuss, as “reconditioning” or “rewiring” your mind/brain.

In this post I want to emphasize that I look at it a tad bit different, and by looking at it in this way, I was able to change things in my life drastically. 

 

My hope in sharing this process with you, is that it in some way may lighten your emotional load and  help you do the same.

 I like to use the word “re-construct” or “re-building.” 

Think of it this way, when the foundation of a building or structure is damaged, or threatened, it will be demolished, then re-constructed. You will waste your time rewiring and reconditioning the structure without restoring its foundation, and that must be done from the bottom up.

In this same fashion you must restore your right to profound change; It’s the elimination of one way of being to construct a new way of being.

 

So, instead of trying to “recondition” or “rewire” the thoughts that hurt, I want you to think of it as a reconstruction of sorts. Become the architect, create the blueprint, and get to building the trajectory of your healing and new found self.

 

Here’s how I did it…

From struggling through my childhood years, to drug addiction, heartbreak, and domestic violence as an adult, I had an extreme amount of resentment built up. 

I was mad at the world and it showed in the detrimental path that I was on for a very long time.

I was depressed, unproductive, isolated, embarrassed, lonely, and I felt absolutely broken.

When I looked in the mirror, I saw failure staring back at me.

 

I tried to build new habits, force myself out of depression, I even went to church searching for some spiritual relief; hoping for a miracle to cure my wounds and whisk away the pain.

It took me years to realize that there was no REAL change I could make to the person that I was in that very moment. 

 

I had to completely reconstruct the thoughts and beliefs that I had about myself.

In order to be happy and find purpose in my life, I had to become willing to accept what I’d been through, in order to change and truly discover who I was.

 

Reconstructing my entire thought process is what I had to do to become the person that I am today.

I hit the RESTART button, and it all began with 2 daily rituals that I want to share with you today.

 

Developing a deep rooted sense of forgiveness.

Forgive yourself and others.

This will not happen easily, but I believe in you! You are stronger than you think.

 

It’s very hard to get over how others have made you feel, especially when the treatment stems from someone you trusted or genuinely cared for. It’s even harder to get out of your own head about “allowing” these things to happen in the first place, and that leads to self-blame. 

What others did to you and how they made you feel is not your reality, it was and probably still is their reality. Even if it was more of a circumstance, opposed to a direct affliction, the same antidote may be applied. 

 

You may be a piece in someone else’s puzzle and that may bring about some “why me?…” questions, mostly because you were hurt in the process.

 

It’s one of those things that you had no control over, but when it is deep in your Heart’s Pain Points it isn’t so simple at all.

When people treat others badly, when they talk down to or hurt other people, both mentally/emotionally and physically, something inside of them is incomplete. It had, and has, absolutely nothing to do with you.

 

With compassion you can reconstruct the experience as a whole. Allow your vulnerability to shine through. In this way you can begin to create the new person that you desire to be, a person who is no longer a victim to the pain.

 

Once you’ve accomplished this, you can alter the existence of the experience altogether by replacing it and giving it a whole new meaning. 

 

When I was 17 years old I was date raped by someone who was supposed to be a friend, and I was turned away by the authorities.

The rape kit at the hospital showed that there was more than 1 assailant and I have to live with that for the rest of my life, with no justice served. I held on to the clothes that I had on that night for two whole years.

Everyday I passed the bag, and my stomach would turn. I began to feel disgusted with myself, and began to replay that night in my head, thinking of things that I could have done differently. I went into a looooooong episode of depression behind this.

When I began my forgiveness rituals, this was one of the hardest to work through.

How do I learn to forgive someone who has violated my body, and my soul, all in one night that I can’t take back? No matter how many times I replayed it in my head, it did not change my reality, it only made it worse.

When I stopped blaming myself, the healing began. I asked “what must a person who can do such things have gone through in their own lives?”

I felt sorry for him and whatever his circumstance.

I prayed for him and that’s when it happened, the shift occurred. I was no longer a silent victim.

I began to do this same thing when it came to every other aspect in my past and present reality that made me feel less than.

 

The forgiveness ritual involved breathing exercises and visualization.

 

Do this:

Create a mantra that you can repeat at the start of your day that includes “I let go and let be, that is no longer me.”

 

Every morning my mantra was:

 “I will not fear my reflection. I let go and let be, that is no longer me.”

 

I showered every morning while repeating my mantra, envisioning the water washing away all impurities of my past. After a while, I felt at ease and really thought of whoever caused me pain with compassion, love, and light. Washing away the self blame and disgrace, right down the drain.

 

It was a ritual that I faithfully kept until I no longer felt the need to repeat it anymore, it became what I truly felt. Living in constant turmoil and feeling victimized was no longer who I was. 

 

Starting your day geared toward forgiveness will always open your mind and heart to endless change, and most importantly self- love.

 

What you give out, you get back, so if you are emanating love, compassion, and practicing this ritual on a daily basis, you will begin to alter your subconscious mind. The reality of your emotions and thoughts will begin to mirror your attempt.

 

Your only responsibility in this small technique in the reconstructing process is to not skip a day. Perform the “Forgiveness Ritual” daily.

 

You are conditioning your mind to process a thought differently, specifically the thoughts that make you feel the pain from any past experience.

 

Every feeling is attached to a thought, or you wouldn’t feel anything at all. It all starts with the thought that enters your mind. Think of the experience in a different light and the feeling attached to it will begin to change too.

 

Let your vulnerability shine through –  

Many of us get stuck in a habitual way of thinking because we are highly connected to our emotions. However, being aware of your emotions, of how you feel, should never be deemed a weakness. 

You are allowing yourself to experience, to love and to live freely, with trust and faith in the good that exists in the world. That’s a beautiful thing, it should never be regarded as a weakness.

We all look for vulnerabilities in others. 

 

How else do we remain open to love, trust, and experience soul connections?

 

It’s just unfortunate that many who find it, abuse it. Some do it without even realizing it. The lack or loss of deep connection to others can run anyone into a depressive rut.

Closing the doors and isolating yourself may seem tempting, but your light was not meant to be kept secluded. You have purpose my dear, and I’m here to remind you of that!

 

Everyday remind yourself of your beauty and strength.

It’s important that you start small.

Don’t set a goal that will overwhelm you and that you will most likely not stick to.

Here’s an example of how I began to combat my adult depression back in 2013:

I was sleeping my days away. I set a goal of simply waking up, and getting fully dressed (even if I wasn’t going out). After a week, I added making one phone call to a friend or family member after I got dressed.

 

After two weeks, I then added, get up, get dressed, and drink my coffee at a local shop. This got me out of the house.

The next month, I invited a friend or family member to meet me at the shop. (I failed a lot along the way, but one small step was a big win. I always felt better afterwards, I know you will too.)

Shifting from a very dark place emotionally and mentally is not easy. Every little step is a milestone. Before you know it, you will be making strides and finding yourself again.

Challenge the toxic habit (your subconscious need) of talking about it (“it” being the problem/ the Heart’s Pain Point.)

When you live through hurtful life experiences (without you even noticing) you refer to it, a lot.

Well, let’s think about this for a second. You have been down and out about something hurtful for a while and when you begin to re-enter the social sphere, you really don’t have much to chat about, but that which you know.

It’s okay to say that. For instance, I told my sister that I’ve been isolated for so long that I don’t even know what to talk about, and this helped clear up any awkward silence.

I speak from experience.

 

Simply controlling your urge to speak on it will set the reset button into overdrive; the reconstruction of your mind requires for you to take away the power of the experience itself, but only once you have accepted it.

Think of it this way, a person, let’s say a speaker or even a preacher may share a testimony. During this testimony they share what may have tore them apart, but they quickly shift and focus on the glorious transition it caused in their life.

 

Try your hardest not to talk about it, or even mention it, unless it’s for the purpose of forgiving in meditation, or uplifting others. 

While venting and expressing yourself is very healthy, you need to realize that the simple act of speaking on it may cause you to relive the experiences. You must steer clear of triggers outside of a controlled setting.

 

So yes, have your moment with someone (therapist, psychologist, family, friend etc.) but vow to leave it there when you’re done.

You continue to give the experience life if you continue to speak on it time and time again. Let it go with your morning forgiveness ritual.

 

Let it go with intent. The feelings and emotions no longer have a place in your life.

You will slip up on this one and that’s okay, trauma lives within and governs so much of your thought process, but when you become aware that you are doing it, admit it and with intent change the perspective and end goal of the conversation. (For example: “I say that to say – insert positive perspective/ lesson/ triumph)

 

I would say, “why am I even talking about this, (XYZ) is not even worth my breath, please stop me if you hear I revert back to that topic.” Then I’d quickly change the topic or simply stay silent. I did this for a long time, it took some getting used to.

While letting your vulnerability shine through may seem like a mountain to climb, I can reassure you that people will be open to your candor, and there are so many beautiful souls out in the world that are ready, willing, and able to help you reconstruct from the inside-out.

 

Allow love and life back in.

Begin with these 2 exercises; as simple as they may seem to alot of people, I know it’s hard for those battling depression and PTSD. 

 

With time, they’ve helped me reconstruct my emotions surrounding what I’ve experienced, build new relationships, and start writing again. 

 

I pray that you find peace and that these techniques work for you.

 

Until next time…

I truly do appreciate you!